blowery:

ALT

kaijutegu:

reblog if the best idea that you could come up with was falling over and lying on the ground like a lump

sgt-celestial:

ms word ms excel and ms powerpoint are all snooty disagreeable ladies who wont speak to me due to my meager dowry but then i meet their beautiful sister ms paint whos clumsy but charming and we fall in beautiful love. and i become mr paint

tony-the-tigers-juicy-armpit:

today’s children are gonna become teens and clown the shit out of us for ‘eepy’ and 'blorbo’ but they’ll say it in cocomelonese so we won’t understand them

i-say-ok:

ittybittybumblebee:

Whatever its called to have these kinds of colourful squares in your home i want it

Look

ok!

pikaole:

Lucky rainy day

yournewfriendshouse:

c-53:

Another fun thing I do with customers - specifically parents of very small children who don’t know they’re alive yet - is directly imply I think the coffee is for the baby, not the parent. and lemme tell you, like 70% of parents eat that shit up. They immediately go along with the bit and start discussing it with their newborn child, while the baby just stares at us like 😮

ALT

forestslut:

blujayonthewing:

unclefather:

they’re not even his teeth

dantes-infernal-chili:

laramieslims:

I call this one “what if salmon just kept getting worse”

They done crumpled my boy

nastywizard:

nastywizard:

LET’S HEAR IT FOR TINNITUS!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

werewolftits:

werewolftits:

tiktok is such an awful app, it’s almost designed to feed you misinformation and expose you to insane discourse. unlike beloved tumblr, the app that feeds me misinformation and exposes me to insane discourse

scoutandcowpany:

wellwhiskey:

wellwhiskey:

need the top minds in moral philosophy here on tunglr.website to weigh in on this one (x , x)

pulmonary-poultry:

vampireapologist:

calybium:

vampireapologist:

uglyfun:

I just learned that the Russian word for “ladybug” translates to “God’s Little Cow”

It’s the same in Irish! bóín Dé!

in hebrew it’s “our rabbi moses’s cow”

Oh I love this news!!!!

Multiple cultures upon seeing a ladybug for the first time: “Who’s cow is this????”

lindleland:

marinebiologyshitposts:

marinebiologyshitposts:

lorlocks:

Got curious about if scallops have brains and

Pretty sure this article was written by a scallop 🤔

and if we did?

they did they did they did I meant and if they did